In Memory of Connor
Hi Lisa,
Me and my wife have just lost our boy to Liver disease. It crept up so quickly we are both still in shock and disbelief. He slowed down eating etc around 4 before. As with you he had symptoms before this but they were up and down and we just believed that after antibiotics he was better. By the time we got him to the vet recently he was not a well boy. He had blood in the liver and was not getting better, as we were waiting for Blood tests etc to be done. They put him on a drip to replace any lost fluids and we were just left to wait for the results while he was tested. After a long wait we were told that he was effectively bleeding to death. We made the obvious decision to have him put down. As hard as this was for me and my wife we felt that there was nothing else to do. ALthough i was gutted. As with you guys we found ourselves telling him how much we love him and telling him this was for the best. He died in my arms on Thursday 25 Feb. Me and my wife are both devastated and cant help but blame ourselves that we should have picked it up sooner. We love our dogs and we still have Connor’s friend Matilda who is keeping us sane but still miss and think of him everyday.
Everything I do leads to this beautifully natured dog who had such a impact on us. I wanted to share this with you as I believe that Connor was so special it would not seem right not having his story for others to read. He was a Legend and will be missed deeply.
Please Please Please anyone with any of the symptoms get their dogs checked. Even if you are not sure. Its so better to be safe rather than sorry.
We love you Connor
Take care buddy.
Matt and Gabrielle Page
Your Dog
The years go so very fast and before you know it that romping pup is
Old and grey muzzled and they have sat by our sides while we read, watch TV,
And work on our computers. Every so often they come and lay their heads in Our laps, toss our elbow with their muzzle or gaze into our eyes and wait for Us to notice them.
Take a moment now to remember what they mean to you:
I am your dog, and I have a little something I’d like to whisper in your ear
I know that you humans lead busy lives. Some have to work, some have
children to raise. It always seems like you are running here and running
there, often much too fast, often never noticing the truly grand things in
life.
Look down at me now, while you sit there at your computer. See the way my
dark brown eyes look at yours? They are slightly cloudy now. That comes
with age. The gray hairs are beginning to ring my soft muzzle.
You smile at me; I see love in your eyes. What do you see in mine? Do you
see a spirit? A soul inside, who loves you as no other could in the world?
A spirit that would forgive all trespasses of prior wrong doing for just a
simple moment of your time? That is all I ask. To slow down, if even for a
few minutes, to be with me.
So many times you have been saddened by the words you read on that screen,
Of others of my kind, passing. Sometimes we die young and oh so quickly,
Sometimes so suddenly it wrenches your heart out of your throat.
Sometimes, we age so slowly before your eyes that you may not even seem to
know until the very end, when we look at you with grizzled muzzles and
cataract clouded eyes.
Still the love is always there, even when we must take that long sleep,
To run free in a distant land.
I may not be here tomorrow; I may not be here next week. Someday you
Will shed the water from your eyes, that humans have when deep grief fills
Their souls, and you will be angry at yourself that you did not have just
“one more day ” with me. Because I love you so, your sorrow touches my
spirit and grieves me.
We have NOW, together. So come, sit down here next to me on the floor,
And look deep into my eyes. What do you see? If you look hard and deep
Enough we will talk, you and I, heart to heart. Come to me not as “alpha”
or as “trainer” or even “Mom or Dad,” come to me as a living soul and stroke my
Fur and let us look deep into one another’s eyes and talk. I may tell you
Something about the fun of chasing a tennis ball, or I may tell you
something Profound about myself, or even life in general.
You decided to have me in your life because you wanted a soul to share such
Things with. Someone very different from you, and here I am. I am a dog,
But I am alive. I feel emotion, I feel physical senses, and I can revel in
the Differences of our spirits and souls.
I do not think of you as a “Dog on two feet” — I know what you are and who
You are. You are human, in all your quirkiness, and I love you still.
Now, come sit with me, on the floor. Enter my world, and let time slow
Down if only for 15 minutes. Look deep into my eyes, and whisper into my
ears. Speak with your heart, with your joy, and I will know your true self.
We may not have tomorrow, but we do have today, and life is oh so very short
So please–come sit with me now and let us share these precious moments we
Have together.
- Love, on behalf of canines everywhere.
Your Dog
Author Unknown
Aid for Pets and Pet Owners
This is a list of resources for pet owners looking for financial help for anything pet related from medication to pet food to housing issues. This list was…..
Compiled by various pet-loving friends
Organized by Patricia Collier, Owner of FloridaPets.net
Although some of these organizations listed are specific to Florida, some have locations and contacts all over the US. Feel free to contact them to see if there is someone in your area that can help.
Please understand these are not places where you can give your pet away. These resources are to help you keep your pet. Please read or call for their qualifications before applying for assistance.
Here is the link to the complete list of resources. I hope this helps many of you that have contacted me about somewhere to turn when you are in need.
One Year
Hello to all of you that have used our website and contacted me this past year.
From the time I put the website up in January to this past week, the affirmation that I have received from you all has been amazing. I used to get 1-2 emails per month asking for resources, sharing stories or just looking for a sympathetic ear and now I get 1-2 per day. We have over 3300 visitors to the website each month and we are #1 on google for various search terms related to canine liver disease. Our site has become successful beyond what I could have imagined.
The good news is that the website is helping to inform, give hope and connect people who are dealing with this terrible disease. It is becoming a premiere resource for people searching for information to help their pets and dear friends & I am SO grateful that I can be a part of making a difference, even a small one, in the lives of a family and their furry friend.
It has been 1 year on this exact day since our beloved Reiley passed away and I am reminded each day through the work I do for CLDF that her death was not in vain. I miss her each and every day and am very sad that she was taken from me at only 9 years of age by something so terrible as liver disease. I am angry that more is not done to help understand and eradicate this problem and I am working toward trying to make a difference in the prevention and early detection of CLD.
Thank you to all who have written to me, called and emailed, it is for you and your pets that I do what I do. Thank you for helping me to keep Reiley’s memory alive and well each and every day, I do miss her very much and love her still.
Sincerely,
Lisa Smith
Founder, Canine Liver Disease Foundation
Dedicated to my first “baby”, Reiley - I love you, miss you & we are making a difference!
Dog’s Last Will and Testament
On the 1 year anniversary of our Reiley passing away, I thought I would post this poignant piece of writing. May it help any of you that are going through what we went through just a year ago. Our hearts still ache & we miss our girl everyday but know she is feeling better now. ~ Lisa
I came across this wonderful piece of writing by Eugene O’Neill, the well known American playwright and a Nobel prize recipient. He reportedly wrote this to comfort his wife when their beloved dog, Blemie, was in his last days:
” Last Will and Testament”
I, Silverdene Emblem O’Neill (familiarly known to my family, friends and acquaintances as Blemie), because the burden of my years is heavy upon me, and I realize the end of my life is near, do hereby bury my last will and testament in the mind of my Master. He will not know it is there until I am dead. Then, remembering me in his loneliness, he will suddenly know of this testament, and I ask him then to inscribe it as a memorial to me.
I have little in the way of material things to leave. Dogs are wiser than men. They do not set great store upon things. They do not waste their time hoarding property. They do not ruin their sleep worrying about objects they have, and to obtain the objects they have not. There is nothing of value I have to bequeath except my love and my faith. These I leave to those who have loved me, to my Master and Mistress, who I know will mourn me most, to Freeman who has been so good to me, to Cyn and Roy and Willie and Naomi and – but if I should list all those who have loved me it would force my Master to write a book. Perhaps it is in vain of me to boast when I am so near death, which returns all beasts and vanities to dust, but I have always been an extremely lovable dog.
I ask my Master and Mistress to remember me always, but not to grieve for me too long. In my life I have tried to be a comfort to them in time of sorrow, and a reason for added joy in their happiness. It is painful for me to think that even in death I should cause them pain. Let them remember that while no dog has ever had a happier life (and this I owe to their love and care for me), now that I have grown blind and deaf and lame, and even my sense of smell fails me so that a rabbit could be right under my nose and I might not know, my pride has sunk to a sick, bewildered humiliation. I feel life is taunting me with having over lingered my welcome. It is time I said good-by, before I become too sick a burden on myself and on those who love me.
It will be sorrow to leave them, but not a sorrow to die. Dogs do not fear death as men do. We accept it as part of life, not as something alien and terrible which destroys life. What may come after death, who knows? I would like to believe with those of my fellow Dalmatians who are devout Mohammedans, that there is a Paradise where one is always young and full-bladdered; here all the day one dillies and dallies with an amorous multitude of houris, beautifully spotted; where jack-rabbits that run fast but not too fast (like the houris) are as the sands of the desert; where each blissful hour is mealtime; where in long evenings there are a million fireplaces with logs forever burning and one curls oneself up and blinks into the flames and nods and dreams, remembering the old brave days on earth, and the love of one’s Master and Mistress.
I am afraid this is too much for even such a dog as I am to expect. But peace, at least, is certain. Peace and long rest for weary old heart and head and limbs, and eternal sleeps in the earth I have loved so well. Perhaps, after all, this is best.
One last request I earnestly make. I have heard my Mistress say, ‘When Blemie dies we must never have another dog. I love him so much I could never love another one.’ Now I would ask her, for love of me, to have another. It would be a poor tribute to my memory never to have a dog again. What I would like to feel is that, having once had me in the family, now she cannot live without a dog! I have never had a narrow jealous spirit. I have always held that most dogs are good (and one cat, the black one I have permitted to share the living-room rug during the evenings, whose affection I have tolerated in a kindly spirit, and in rare sentimental moods, even reciprocated a trifle). Some dogs, of course, are better than others. Dalmatians, naturally, as everyone knows, are best.
So I suggest a Dalmatian as my successor. He can hardly be as well bred, or as well mannered or as distinguished and handsome as I was in my prime. My Master and Mistress must not ask the impossible. But he will do his best, I am sure, and even his inevitable defects will help by comparison to keep my memory green. To him I bequeath my collar and leash and my overcoat and raincoat, made to order in 1929 at Hermes in Paris. He can never wear them with the distinction I did, walking around the Place Vendome, or later along Park Avenue, all eyes fixed on me in admiration; but again I am sure he will do his utmost not to appear a mere gauche provincial dog. Here on the ranch, he may prove himself quite worthy of comparison, in some respects. He will, I presume, come closer to jackrabbits than I have been able to in recent years. And, for all his faults, I hereby wish him the happiness I know will be his in my old home.
One last word of farewell, Dear Master and Mistress. Whenever you visit my grave, say to yourselves with regret but also with happiness in your hearts at the remembrance of my long happy life with you: ‘here lies one who loved us and whom we loved.’ No matter how deep my sleep I shall hear you, and not all the power of death can keep my spirit from wagging a grateful tail. “
In Memory of Karna
Family and friends,
We want you to know that Karna, our 5 year old German Shepherd, was put to sleep today due to irreversible liver disease.
He was a brave and loving dog who brought warmth and affection to all he met. He will be deeply missed.
Love,
Tony and Melissa
Financial Assistance for Veterinary Bills
PLEASE CONTACT KARNA’S OWNER, TONY, DIRECTLY IF YOU HAVE ANY INFORMATION THAT MAY HELP HIM AND HIS FAMILY
Thank you for the wonderful web site you created dedicated to Canine Liver Disease. I’ve found the information helpful in understanding the disease diagnosis I just received for my 5-year old male German Shepherd, Karna (a rescue).
After treatment in August from my veterinarian for cracking and flaking paws and lethargy proved unsuccessful, she referred me to the North Carolina State University Veterinary School for a diagnosis at their dermatology clinic. I took him last week and was informed that Karna had Phenobarbital induced (he has a history of seizures) Hepatocutaneous Syndrome - also known as necrolytic migratory erythema (NME). This is apparently a new and extremely rare disorder. They want to start a treatment on him quickly that will cost $750-1500 initially, with one or two additional treatments possible and ongoing therapies of injections (administered by yours truly) 3-4 times a day.
Here’s the reason for my email: I am currently unemployed and have been for some time (my profession is tied to the construction industry – hardest hit in this economy, as you probably know). I received my last unemployment insurance check in June and my wife and I are hanging on by a thread. This event with Karna has already put us in debt to the tune of nearly $1200 on top of an additional $700 we spent in February at another specialist (canine neurologist) for treatment of anticonvulsant toxicity he was diagnosed with then. I’m not complaining, I’d do it all over again. We love our boy very much. But we’re facing the reality now of having to make a decision between treatment or euthanasia because we have come to the end of our financial resources. I have asked the NCSU Vet School if we would qualify for financial assistance. The person who makes that decision is out until this Monday when I am scheduled to take Karna in for treatment. So we do not yet know if we will qualify. But we are taking a leap of faith and going ahead with the treatment in the hopes that we will be approved for assistance. However, if we are NOT approved, we will be in financial trouble and likely will be at the tipping point of being able to pay our bills. So I want to ask you if you can direct me to any other organizations that might be able to help my wife and I pay for Karna’s treatments.
Karna is probably the sweetest dog I’ve ever owned. He loves absolutely everyone and doesn’t have a mean bone in his body. He is a frequent hugger, known to wrap his long neck around the legs of those he meets. He deserves a shot at regaining his health. He’s been a brave boy through all of his misery and we want so much to save him. He has many years left in this world if we can do so. The doctor who will be treating him (Dr. Olivery) is optimistic that the treatments will help Karna regain liver function, but admits that only time will tell. Unfortunately, because of the economic downturn, the timing for all of us in this matter couldn’t be worse. I am not one to ask for charity, but I see no other course right now if I wish to try and save my buddy. Any information or help you might be able to provide is very, very much appreciated.
A Touching Memorial Poem
This message was posted to one of the Canine Liver Disease Yahoo Groups that I belong to and I really loved the sentiment so I thought I would post it here for everyone to read.
When I was a puppy
I was very much afraid
Then I met you
And I knew I belonged to someone who would always care
When I was a young dog
I did some things to try you
And you would sometimes get angry, but in the end
You never stopped loving me.
When I was a grown up dog
Oh, the fun we had!
I think I loved the hose no, the ball, no, agility class
Well, it all was so wonderful, to spend my happiest and best days with you.
When I was a middle aged dog
You understood when I could not do the things I once could
When I would tire on a walk
How I loved to be carried home safely in your arms
When I became an older dog
I could see my whole life in your eyes.
You were so loving and patient
And I loved nothing more than to just lie quietly with you
When I became a sick dog
Oh the sadness we both felt
But how you cared for me
Oh, that I will never forget
You’d wipe my eyes, and clean me up
And never once got angry
When I would lose control of my body
Your patience and understanding were what let me keep my dignity
When I was a dying dog
You never once left me
Although it was hard for you to watch me as my life came to an end
You did so out of a love stronger than I had ever known before
As I lay in your arms
My whole life flashed before me
And I saw that it was a good life, filled with wonderful memories to last me over the bridge…and beyond
All because you were my person, and I was your dog
In Memory of my golden girl Reiley “Monster” - I miss you still after all these months. I love you!!
<
Elevated Liver Enzymes
A year ago at Jake’s annual checkup a senior panel was done and his Alk Phos level was elevated at 360. We had follow up 3 and 4 month follow up testing and it was unchanged. No other values were elevated at that time. We had our annual checkup last week and the results of his liver enzyme panel were not good. This time not only was the alk phos elevated to 662 but his ast and alt levels were also elevated, 289 and 687 respectfully. Obviously this was very disheartening as he is clinically asymptomatic. He shows no signs of any problems associated with these results. I immediately got on the internet and started reading to understand more about the potential for liver disease and found your foundation website. I wanted to tap into your experience and knowledge and hopefully get some feedback from you. We have an appointment Monday for xrays. My concern is this is the first time other enzyme levels have been elevated and could this be a fluke or testing error!! I found a round table discussion on this and it suggested repeating the test in 2 to 3 weeks to substantiate the results. I need to have this discussion with my vet and will do so Monday. Another concern is what I am feeding Jake. About six months ago I put him on a raw food diet (Primal). I tried to find info to see if this could be potentiating a liver problem. The only supplements he is on are kelp and a probiotic. I did have him on milk thistle when the initial alk phos level was elevated but only did this for two months. He has been on other nutritional supplements for skin and coat but I stopped those. I forgot he is also on organic coconut oil. There is a local health food store that specializes in dog nutrition and I have been following some of their recommendations for maximizing Jake’s health. Other than this Jake has had occasional ear , skin, and pad issues but for the most part had remained in good health. I might also add we exercise regularly, walking twice a day weather permitting. Needless to say I am quite concerned and any help you can provide would be greatly appreciated. I am considering requesting a consult to see an internal vet specialist. I have some other questions about further testing such as serum bile acid. I might also add that I am in medicine myself and knowing what I know about the human element heightens questions and poses trust issues in the care and treatment of Jake!!! I have had some unpleasant vet experiences and just changed vets so at this point my confidence level is being tested and it scares me… Thanks for listening and I look forward to hearing from you.
Thanks
Barb and Jake
Memorial Writing
Someone posted this nice memorial to a Canine Liver Disease group that I belong to. I thought it was very well written and poignant
Written and © copyrighted by Terri Onorato
I know what you’re thinking. You think I’m dead. Because you cannot see me
with your human eyes, cannot feel me with your hands or hold me in your arms
you think I am gone forever. You recall how I looked when I left this earth
and you cannot remotely imagine that I am alive in another place. You are
racked and torn by the pain of our separation and it blinds you to that
which is right in front of you…me.
How many times since I left your immediate sight have you been told that I’m
dead and you should “get over it”? How many times have you cried yourself to
sleep because you feel like an outcast, believing you’re supposed to get
over me because that’s what people say is normal but somehow you can’t and
no one seems to understand? How many times have you put yourself through
such excruciating pain because you aren’t willing to consider that I am not,
by any means, dead?
I want you to do me a favour and go back in time with me. Remember the
glorious day you brought me home - was I not the most intriguing creature
you’d ever met? Did I not make you laugh and giggle? Did I not look at you
with such adoration that you wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of
your life with me? I wanted this too.
Remember the days when I was in my prime and we did many things together.
You were so proud of me! I was a good friend and I took care of you when you
cried, were angry or felt down and unhappy. When you didn’t have a lot of
time for me because of your obligations, I waited patiently for you. I was
always there when you needed me. Did I not look at you with such acceptance
and patience that perhaps at times you felt a bit unworthy? You were never
unworthy in my eyes.
Remember when age crept up on me, my bones became stiff and my movements
slower. Still I met you when you came home and followed you around. We’d
been together for so long, I was your very best friend regardless of what
you were doing, saying and thinking. Did I not look at you with such
kindness and understanding that you felt overwhelmed? I couldn’t get enough
of you.
Remember the last time we saw each other with earthly eyes. You tried to be
brave but I knew you were crying…I know you so well, better than anyone
else in the world. Did I not look at you with such pure trust and love that
you yearned only to hold me close and keep me with you always? Did you not
promise that you would love me forever? I believed you.
If this is so then why have you let me go by thinking I no longer exist?
Remember the depth of love in my eyes when I looked at you.
I am no longer an earthly figure, this is true. My
body was only part of who I really am and it would have been but a mere
shell on earth if it were not filled to overflowing with my soul, my spirit
and my loving light. When we met you thought I was cute, pretty and adorable
What kind of relationship would we have had if this were all that I’d been?
How could you have loved me if I’d had no spiritual substance?
We are all made up of energy that resides far deep down inside of us, it is
our core and our soul, spirit and loving light. It is the energy that is all
of life…it has no beginning, it has no end. It simply is and always will
be and without it there is no life. You can’t see it with the naked eye nor
can you hold it in your hand, it is simply a certain knowing that this
energy does exist. It’s a knowing just as you know that our love existed on
earth - you couldn’t see our love in a solid sense, you couldn’t gather it
all up and confine it to one place. But you *knew* it existed. There was no
doubt in your mind.
There are those who demand you get over me, insisting that I’m dead and you
ll never see me again because animals don’t go to Heaven. Oh really? I’m
here to tell you different. You were as worthy of my love and undying
devotion on earth as I was of yours. Do you really believe this love would
be snatched from us *forever* simply because I wasn’t
human? Was I not a living, breathing creation with personality? How could I
have been so if I didn’t possess the energy of soul, spirit and loving
light? And if this energy is and always will be, then how can it be that I
am dead? If my core is not the energy that is all of life then I was never
alive to begin with. But you know better.
You cry because you miss me, this I understand. I miss you too - I miss the
belly rubs, hugs and kisses that we shared. But life does go on beyond these
wonderful, fulfilling physical connections. I came to this place to continue
on in a new life, not because I didn’t love you anymore or because I wanted
something better. I came here because it was time for me to go to the next
phase of my existence, something all living creatures must do eventually. It
is the normal progression of life. I was not taken away from you because you
cannot take away that which was never owned. My presence in your life was
and is a gift to be cherished and honored just as I cherish and honor you.
Life is not simply about being born into a body, living a certain number of
years and then dying. Energy cannot die. We are blessed with time in a body
so that we can learn, share and grow. It prepares us for the next phase of
our eternal life. The body holds within it the true life force of our
existence…our soul, spirit and loving light. Without these our bodies
would be empty, blank, void of feeling and expression. Without our energy we
would indeed be dead and could never have experienced our love for each
other.
You say that all you have left are memories but this is not so. You see,
when I took leave of my earthly body I left a little something behind for
you. You can’t touch it, hold it or examine it, for what I left behind is
far too uninhibited for confinement. I left in your tender care a piece of
my soul. I placed it right next to your own which is quite fitting as we
were always side by side in our earthly life together. I love you too much
to have left you with nothing but memories that tend to fade and grow cloudy
as the years go by. I love you too much to have vanished without a trace.
How selfish it would be of me to remove love and light from your life.
I understand your tears, each one you shed is testament to your love for me
and I am honored and humbled. But don’t forget the good things we shared -
remember and smile. This is an honor for me as well. When you need me I will
be here. Close your eyes, relax, take slow, deep breaths and picture me in
your mind. Shut off the world and your notions of what you think death is
and give me a chance. Look for the subtle signs I send you. Don’t stop being
proud of me, I am a friend to be proud of, I am still your friend and soul
mate. Don’t memorialize the death of my body but instead honor and celebrate
my never-ending life for it is eternal and forever as is my love for you.
Until we meet again…
